The Beginners Guide To Pegging (What You Need To Know/Do)

Pegging may not be everyone’s cup of tea.

However, there are couples who are looking for a new avenue to explore, and pegging can open up a whole new world of stimulation for him and a wonderful opportunity for role play and power exchange for both partners.

There isn’t a right or wrong way to peg, so as long as you are both following the basics of safe anal play, you will realize how fun and pleasurable it can be for both partners.

Today I am sharing with you by “pegging for beginners” guide including some pegging starter kits you should look into getting.

Here’s everything I will cover below:

What Is Pegging?

beginner's guide to pegging

Pegging is a sexual act where a man is penetrated by a woman wearing a strap-on.

The word pegging elicits responses of shock and even judgment in many, therefore it might not be for everyone. However, as with all sexual positions and sex in general, it is simply all about pleasure.

And make no mistake in thinking that it’s the hot new thing many are curious to try.

Pegging has actually been around since the dawn of time (anything we do, the Romans did it first) but it wasn’t until the 1998 release of sexologist’s sex education video series Bend Over Boyfriend that the act of pegging was given more attention.

Soon after that, back in 2001, the term pegging was coined by sex columnist Dan Savage in his column Savage Love through a poll among his readers where they could vote between peg, bob, and punt.

Peg won out and the rest is history. You could say that the world was a slightly brighter place after that with the experience finally becoming easier to describe.

It all started from there before the famous fashion designer Tom Ford argued in an interview that “every guy should get penetrated at least once in their lives” and popular movies like Deadpool and Broad City both had scenes in which women used a strap-on on men.



How Common Is Pegging?

Anal pleasure for straight men has always been a taboo, partly due to the entire idea of emasculation and partly due to the “eww, that’s disgusting” factor.

After all, the prostate (which is the walnut-size gland found under a man’s bladder))is easily accessible through the anus essentially making it the male G-spot.

Therefore, it is safe to say that in this day and age, more and more men are waking up to the joys of being penetrated by their female partners.

Aside from the intense physical pleasure, one of the best aspects of pegging in a hetero relationship is that it inverts the traditional framework of sexual roles and allows for an entirely new world of pleasure to be discovered.

Even the famous sex toy website LoveHoney says strap-on searches have increased by 195% year on year.

So by that, we can conclude that pegging is perhaps not as taboo these days as it was back in the day and if you really want to try it, Lovehoney confirms that you are definitely not alone.

Why Do Men Like Pegging?

Well, it’s really not that complicated. Why do we all like being penetrated?

For one there is the physical aspect. The reason a finger or a strap-on feels so good is due to the cluster of nerve ending in the anal region.

It’s the stimulation of the exact same nerve as the penis – the pudendal nerve, which enervates the anus, the perineum, and the genitals.

On the other hand, there’s the  psychological aspect.

Men enjoy being on the receiving end because it is, in fact, a very intimate experience and nothing like you see in porn. It takes a lot of trust in a woman to let her peg you.

You have to trust that she’s not going to hurt you, judge you, or try to make you feel bad and guilty for wanting it, and there’s powerful emotional intimacy in that.

Having someone be into it as much as you are and enjoy giving you pleasure makes you feel wanted, which is somewhat unusual for men.

How To Prepare? (Beginner’s Guide To Pegging)

how to ask to be pegged

Before jumping right into it, there are some things you should absolutely do to prepare yourself and your partner for pegging.

Here’s where you should start:

Get comfortable with anal stimulation.

If you are a man interested to try pegging, it may not be the best idea to make that your first experience with anal penetration.

A better idea would be to start on your own and take it from there. Before investing in pegging sex toys and pricey kits from an online sex shop, start with the easiest option which is also free – your fingers.

For sanitary and safety reasons use latex or vinyl gloves and apply lots of lubricants before starting out. This way you will know if the sensation is actually enjoyable for you or you may even change your mind, you never know.

If all goes good from there, you can move on to the next level and incorporate cheaper sex toys like butt plugs or prostate massagers to enhance the sensation.

Exploring on your own will also make you a better and more receptive partner as you will know exactly what you like and what doesn’t really ring your bells.

Talk about it.

Anal sex can be a challenging bitch.

And while many enjoy it dearly, others dread it fiercely. This may be due to an uncomfortable past experience or just the mere thought that it’s going to hurt like all hell.

However, you can have a perfectly safe anal penetration without any pain just as long as you listen to your body.

If you are feeling pain or discomfort, slow down, catch a breath, add more lube, and maybe try a different position or form of stimulation.

All this goes down to talking first. You need to be able to talk about the idea of pegging before starting out. That way you will know where you are and where your partner is with all this before proceeding.

Choose your gear.

Finding a good quality strap-on and the right dildo (we have the best ones listed down below) is key to a positive pegging experience and there are several things to consider when scrolling through online sex shops for the perfect one.

Start out small and take it from there. Pay attention if the dildo material is body-safe and won’t cause any unwanted allergic reaction.

Check if the desired product is soft and bendable or stiff and choose your preferences. Also, make sure to pick up a bottle (or a few) of water-based lubricants.

Condoms are not only there to protect against pregnancy, but against bacteria and infections too. Especially if your partner is using or might use the same dildo afterwards, it is best to keep floating bacteria away from your intimate area.

Slow and steady wins the race.

Pegging can never be rushed, so if you are planning on doing it, it’s best that you schedule in a long foreplay and a lot of warm-up time.

Make sure you are both really turned on, relaxed, and ready. There’s no one way to do it, so you can be creative and let loose while enjoying the sensation.

Just be aware that your personal experience will be nothing like what you see in porn movies.

Don’t forget to lube up.

Something really important to know is that butts are not self-lubricating.

This means you need lots of lubrication to make pegging comfortable and painless.

Depending on what your toy is made of, you can use different types of lube.

Water-based lube is the best for toys because it doesn’t degrade silicone or jelly, is condom friendly, and the easiest to wash off.

While many people prefer silicone lube for anal sex because it’s more slippery and lasts longer, remember that this only works with certain types of toys and it degrades silicone and jelly, isn’t condom friendly, and is a real pain to wash off.

So if you want your toy to last and bring you pleasure over and over again, you can’t go wrong with a water-lube.

5 Great Pegging Starter Kits (For Beginners)

best pegging sex toys

Here are five best sex toys and strap-ons for pegging that every beginner should look into:

#1 LoveHoney Advanced Unisex Strap-On Harness Kit

The Advanced Unisex Strap-On Harness Kit by Lovehoney is the perfect option for a beginner because it has everything you would need to dive into exploring your fantasies at a very affordable price.

The kit comes equipped with a harness that is adjustable to fit the majority of people from 28 inches to 65 inches (US dress size 8 – 28) so the likelihood of this being a great fit for you is high.

It also includes three interchangeable O-rings to accommodate sex toys in different sizes and a small inside pocket where you can insert a bullet vibrator to increase your own stimulation as well.

The strap-on comes equipped with a 7-inch dildo with a sleek finish and curved tip to better stimulate her G-spot or his P-spot, so you don’t have to worry about purchasing one separately.

All of this and it’s still one of the most affordable models on this list! You’ll get a truly fantastic bang for your buck!

#2 Sportsheets Bikini Strap On Silicone Dildo Set

The Sportsheets Bikini Strap-On & Silicone Dildo Set is another great option for a beginner at a still affordable price than most other pegging kits.

The set includes a seductive bikini-style harness that has three points of adjustment, allowing it to fit up to 60-inch hips.

The nitrile O-ring is a great fit for slimmer dildos which measure about 1.25 inches in diameter.

The included 6.5-inch Skyn silicone dildo boasts a glossy finish and a semi-phallic shape. It also has a forward curve and a flat head to better stimulate her G-spot or his P-spot.

#3 Doc Johnson Body Extensions “Be Strong” Hollow Strap On System

Boxy Extensions by Doc Johnson are a truly unique and versatile solution for harness play. Although a little bit pricey compared to the above-mentioned options, this one, in particular, is still excellent for a beginner’s play as it offers all you need and more.

Made to fit any gender, these two-piece sets include an elastic silicone harness that is adjustable to fit different waist sizes between 28 inches and 48 inches, while offering support and comfort.

The hollow silicone dildo attachment is penetrable, smooth, and sturdy enough to withstand vigorous play without budging.

It also includes a premium silicone dildo that feels silky smooth to the touch and measures a total of 7.5 inches in length.

#4 Doc Johnson Body Extensions “Be Aroused” Hollow Strap On System with Vibrations & Remote Control

And here we come to the most pricey and luxurious option of all my mentioned products.

Made to fit any gender, this two-piece set includes an elastic plus silicone harness combined with a premium silicone dildo and built-in vibrations!

The harness is adjustable to fit different waist sizes between 28 inches and 48 inches, while offering good support and comfort.

The hollow silicone dildo attachment is penetrable, smooth, and sturdy enough to withstand even the most vigorous of plays without budging.

The kit features a wavy dildo with a bulbed tip that can be used as a vibrator and controlled via the included remote control and offer ten different vibrating strengths and patterns.

#5 Blush Temptasia Twist Kit Silicone Suction Cup Dildos (Set of Three); $35

Never run out of different sizes, textures, and thickness to explore while trying to figure out what works best for you with this set of three spiraled silicone dildos that is a total steal when it comes to the price.

The collection comes with three different sizes of Temptasia Twist for more versatile playtime. Size up as you become more comfortable with anal penetration, or alternate sizes depending on yours and your partner’s moods.

In any case, spirals of delights await you with this set of swirly-designed dildos that allow for ecstatic sensation as you twist, thrust, ride, or receive.

The dildos are made from platinum silicone with a satin-smooth finish that has a luxurious feel for an incredibly affordable price.

Additionally, the heart-shaped base is made to fit into any strap-on harness, and also serves as a suction cup for hands-free play.

NB: Want to see more pegging kits? We have a new post detailing the top 10 pegging strap ons here.

pegging starter kits

Final Words

So there you have my ultimate guide to pegging for beginners that explains everything you need to know before endeavoring on this exciting journey of unexplored sensations.

I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing all about this pleasurable bedroom play.

I would love to hear if you have previously experimented with pegging or some of the mentioned toys and accessories, so don’t forget to let me know in the comments below.

And if you haven’t – it’s about time you start exploring.